This question was asked of me by my elders when I was a child and usually when I was being my worst self, fighting with my siblings, or behaving in a way that was unacceptable to the adults who were present. Somehow I came to believe that when I "grew up" I would have all the answers and always know the right thing to do. I must have been in my thirties when it occurred to me that "growing up" was a process and not an event. That realization was initially very disturbing.
As I grew into adulthood I gradually developed a number of beliefs about life. These beliefs came to me from parents, teachers, friends, religion, life experiences, books, and many other sources. I stored these believes in my heart like some sort of enchanted forest, a Camelot of values and ideals. When I entered that enchanted forest of beliefs I felt like life was good, right, and true. When life challenged me I would retreat there and look for one of my deep strong truths that would help me feel strong, safe, and secure.
One of my most profound "growing up" experiences has been that of disenchantment: having to go to my enchanted forest and discovering that what gave me such comfort then no longer does that for me. Life has been a process of discovering which of my beliefs is steadfast and which ones need to be adapted or discarded entirely.
When disenchantment happens it can be a challenge to look at life positively. It is a time to stay very close to the Divine in prayer and reflection. It is a time to trust that the Divine will lead me into the enchanted forest and will help me find the way back out, wiser and healthier in what I believe to be true about life and myself. Growing up does not mean that I cast away all of my hopes and dreams but it does call me to look at those beliefs more carefully and, in turn, challenges me to be open to adapting or changing them.
